The Luckiest Guy Alive by John Cooper Clarke EPUB & PDF

The Luckiest Guy Alive by John Cooper Clarke EPUB & PDF – eBook Details Online

  • Status: Available for Free Download
  • Author Name: John Cooper Clarke
  • Book Genre: Audiobook, British Literature, Fiction, Humor, Music, Poetry
  • Series Detail:
  • ISBN # 9781509896059
  • ASIN # 1509896058
  • Edition Language: English
  • Date of Publication: January 1, 2018
  • PDF File Size: 616 KB
  • EPUB File Size: 432 KB

 

The Luckiest Guy Alive
Nothing matters and what if it did
There’s more than one way to make a quid
You’ll be farting through silk if you stick with me kid
I’m the luckiest guy alive
Life is one big happy skive
The luckiest guy alive

Just waiting for the trouble to arrive
On the fairway I’m under par
At the boat club they call me the Commissar
With a monogrammed tankard a-hanging in the bar
I’m the luckiest guy alive
I got a kick-ass drag boat I ain’t allowed to drive
The luckiest guy alive

Just waiting for the trouble to arrive
A broad daylight killing spree
I heard about it on the BBC
Expert opinion tends to agree
Stranger things apparently happen at sea
Anyway don’t worry ’bout me
I’m the luckiest guy alive
A better situation you could only connive
The luckiest guy alive

Just waiting for the trouble to arrive
Time was it was the whole of the Law
That kept my feet on the literal floor
But gravity ain’t my friend no more
Oh no that’s for sure

But I’m the luckiest guy alive
I got a facial tattoo saying please revive
The luckiest guy alive
Just waiting for the trouble to arrive
Attack of the 50ft Woman

Her molecules got magnified
Her faintest whisper amplified
Takes the highway in her stride
She’s a little on the large side
Attack of the 50ft woman
Feeling vaguely discontent
With all the spleen that’s fit to vent
Dressed in a circus tent
Her irritation overspent

To an almost biblical extent
Attack of the 50ft woman
She’s a radioactive predatory flirt
With a figure made to disconcert
Mess with her and you’re gonna get hurt
Lapsed Catholics reconvert
Attack of the 50ft woman
Who needs some overgrown chick
Stomping on their block
Mad bad sad sick

How’s the antidote coming on, Doc?
Sports cars for roller-skates
She straps them on whenever she’s late
She’s too big to appreciate
She’d be better off back in the states
She needs her own space let’s face it
Attack of the 50ft woman

Blacking out the afternoon
She lends an air of ominous gloom
Was it something we said or a phase of the moon
Anyway we ain’t got the room
Attack of the 50ft woman
Attack of the 50ft woman
Please remain alert

Don’t be driving down the outside lane
Peeking up her tent slash skirt
Attempts to reach her only stiffed
Tried gold, flattery, top dollar gifts
In a vain attempt to heal this rift
Still she seems a little bit miffed
Attack of the 50ft woman

What’s the army doing – nada
Totally trashed the state of Nevada
Pissed all over the National Guard
Attack of the 50ft woman
How come nobody seen her coming
Bed Blocker Blues

What me worry I should care
Shit for brains – wire for hair
I seen the future and I ain’t there
Things are gonna get worse

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