Alana & Hudson’s Very Real And Totally Legitimate Marriage (FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS #1) by Audrey Cannon EPUB & PDF – eBook Details Online
- Status: Available for Free Download
- Authors: Audrey Cannon
- Language: English
- Genre: contemporary romance
- Format: PDF / EPUB
- Size: 3.9 MB
- Price: Free
alana
THE WAITING room smelled like disinfectant and Chanel No. 5,
and on the television, Rachael Ray was making the worst-looking pad Thai
that Alana had ever seen. She wasn’t one for superstition, even if she was
wearing her lucky nipple rings and NARS Orgasm blush and had said all of
her affirmations that morning. Hell, she even spent an extra five minutes
tapping on her feminine power, hoping that would somehow tip the scales
in her favor. And while that sounded like a metaphor for masturbation, it
was not. Though she did that too. But that was mainly for the endorphins.
She had texted her friends, letting them know that today (TODAY!!)
was going to be the day that one (she checked her calendar) Dr. Kevin
Bradford was going to be the lucky lucky doctor who would finally give her
that damn referral to the surgeon for a total hysterectomy. Seven was a
lucky number, right? Right.
So maybe the receptionist looked like she had a stick permanently fused
to the inside of her ass, and the one other woman in the waiting room had
been staring daggers at Alana’s absolutely incredible shoes while she
waited. Who wouldn’t gawk in wonder at the Georgia O’Keefe-inspired
stilettos? A person with no taste, that was who.
But she was not letting go of her optimism, even though her
appointment had technically been one hour and thirty-seven minutes ago.
Full. Of. Optimism.
Alana was answering a work email to one of the UX designers,
informing him that she didn’t care what he thought about user experience if
they weren’t physically able to sustain the changes he requested when one
of the nurses walked into the waiting room.
She was petite, blonde, and wearing the expensive scrubs that all the
nurses who were once high school bullies and now side hustled as
Instagram influencers wore.
Don’t judge books by their cover.
Alana leaned tucked her phone into her bag and was about to stand up
when the nurse called the name of the other woman in the waiting room,
and perhaps she was going to start judging books by their covers (and their
tragically boring manicures).
The woman gave Alana a smug grin before following the nurse back, as
though she had won a contest that Alana hadn’t known she was taking part
in.
Rachael Ray was now making dog food from scratch. Alana had eaten a
cold Pop-Tart for breakfast. She had been too lazy to take out her toaster.
‘How’s it going???’ Shannon texted.
‘Still in the waiting room,’ Alana replied. ‘But thinking happy
thoughts!’
If she wrote it, it was true, right?
Right.
Everyone on the internet was having babies. Every ad on all of Alana’s
social media feeds was for baby clothing or maternity wear or strollers.
Which, good for everyone else, but that shit was never going to be her, even
though the algorithms hadn’t learned that yet.
Her phone dinged, and she responded to the UX designer once again,
this time using the phrase, ‘as per my previous email’. She was invincible
now, and now had the energy to wait in this Groundhog Day of a doctor’s
office forever.
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