Dear Ana by I I E EPUB & PDF – eBook Details Online
- Status: Available for Free Download
- Authors: I I E
- Language: English
- Genre: Contemporary Romance
- Format: PDF / EPUB
- Size: 2 MB
- Price: Free
I pressed my hand on my chest in a failed attempt at calming down the
thumps beating erratically against my ribcage. It knew. Her heart knew
where I was, and it was desperately trying to claw through my chest cavity
and escape back to its rightful owner.
Ana Williams
Beloved Daughter, Sister, and Friend
Your Heart Will Live Forever
1992-2010
I still couldn’t believe it had already been ten years. Ten fucking years
since the worst day of my life. I always assumed Ana was my age, but
according to her gravestone, she was three years older than me. Or would
be, if she was still alive. At least she was frozen at the ripe age of eighteen.
At least she never had to worry about getting old and wrinkly.
At least she was dead.
“Your heart will live forever,” I repeated under my breath, and a
strangled laugh tumbled from my lips. Did her family put that there because
they knew I would visit her one day? Did they mean it metaphorically?
Religiously? Or were they just stating facts because they knew someone
else had her heart? Either way, it felt like a slap in the face. A slap I
unequivocally deserved.
None of that mattered, though. I wasn’t here to analyze her gravestone
or pretend to weep over her oh, so tragic death. I was here because I needed
my last moment on this earth to mean something. My lungs’ last breath
needed to be significant enough that it would make up for the weak and
pathetic act I was about to submit to. So far the only thing this place was
doing for me, was ripping open the hole in my soul even wider than it was
before.
It wasn’t guilt tearing me apart. It wasn’t grief, or sadness, or shame.
Those feelings were consistent and steady and I barely noticed their
presence anymore. This was something else. Something bigger and deeper
that I recognized instantaneously, like an old friend––no, not a friend––an
acquaintance that I knew since birth but kept my distance because I saw
how they treated the people close to me.
I saw how quickly they tainted
your innocence with toxicity and turned you into a monster and I didn’t
want to be a monster, but sometimes I couldn’t resist saying hello just to see
how it felt. This was one of those sometimes as I stood here, glowering at a
fancy stone inscribed with ironic metaphors and that new but old anger
rising up into my lungs, chest, throat, and begging to come out in a wave of
dreadful vengeance.
The scene played out behind my eyes and suddenly a shovel appeared
and I was vigorously digging away at the snow and wet dirt standing
between me and the forever eighteen-year-old girl resting peacefully
beneath my feet. The shovel wasn’t enough so I dropped onto my hands
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